The Quest for Happiness!

The quest for happiness! I’m in! Everyone seems to be on it, so yep, me too!!!

What does it mean to be on a quest for something? I suppose it means I am on a journey, a search; looking for something I don’t already have or something that has been lost. I’ve always possessed the skills required for detective work, being observant and analytical, so I should be good at this!

So then what is happiness? What am I searching for? Is it a tangible, hidden treasure buried deep within the earth that I need to travel far to uncover? I don’t often like to travel far from home, so I sure hope not. Will I know it when I find it? Will it be labeled? And once I find it is there the risk someone may try to steal it from me? Do I need to keep it hidden so nobody knows I have it?

Or is happiness an intangible feeling associated with excitement and fun? If so, am I really on a quest for the things, people, or places that will bring me to those experiences? And how many do I need to collect before I am done searching? I often have long, tiring days. I’m not sure I have the time, energy, or money to add more “stuff” in my waking hours that can make my life more exciting.

Well this is all seeming a bit hopeless to me now. Maybe this isn’t a quest I’m cut out for. How will a person like me ever find happiness?

The good news is that happiness, as I have discovered, isn’t any of these things! I don’t need to travel far to find it and once I’ve revealed it to myself there isn’t a person or situation that can take it away from me. Sure happiness can be experienced through excitement and fun but can also survive through moments of calmness, boredom, and even those that may be unpleasant.

What is happiness? Where do I find it? How do I get it? How do I keep it?

Happiness is a choice that I make, everyday! It is a contentment within myself and only I can control it. It is hidden within the decisions I make to do the “right” thing and strive to live my life with honesty, integrity, self-control, courage, love, kindness, gratitude, and humility. It isn’t only available to those with a lot of free time or money or even good health. We can all fulfill this craving regardless of our circumstances. The quest doesn’t require I travel on an archeological dig to ancient ruins. Instead it requires a trip deep into my heart where my soul’s true desires lie, waiting to be exposed to the world around me. Happiness is not my reaction to luxury items, exotic vacations, wealth, popularity, good health, or even laughter. It is an action I take knowing, at the end of each day, that I have done all I could to truly feel alive! It is a quest I will continue pursuing all the days of my life. Allowing myself forks in the road that I will meet with a gentle patience, and forgiveness.

The quest for happiness! I’m definitely in!



Traces of Her

Our son. 

Does he have her smile or does he mimic mine?
Does he share her stubbornness or is he an independent strong willed child?
Does he enjoy her skip or is that a reflection of his day?

So many things I don’t know about the woman he would have called mommy.
Too many things I do know.

He had a rough start at life due to her choices.
He continues to struggle every day since.

Did she face similar trials? 

Did she laugh often too?
Did she have someone read her a bedtime story also?
Did she love to tell knock-knock jokes as well?

Did she feel loved like he does?

So little is known, yet he is proof that she existed.
She has left her mark on this world.

Our son. 

It’s all About Time(ing)

I love those moments of clarity and confirmation when the universe is boldly letting you know you are on the right path. 

I went on a long overdue matinee movie date today with a girlfriend.  We had been trying to get together since the end of September to celebrate her birthday, but it took this long for our schedules to line up. Having such a small window of opportunity to watch a movie while the kids are in school means needing to choose one that starts in the eleven o’clock hour.  We had decided Friday would work and she sent me a quick text to let me know that there was indeed a movie that sounded decent showing in our timeframe. Perfect! I trust her judgement, so I did not check to see what the movie was about.  I got to the theater ahead of her to purchase our tickets but couldn’t remember the name of the movie. There were two starting at 11:00 am, Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa, and About Time. Assuming we are not the ‘Jackass’ kind of gals,  I correctly bought the tickets to About Time.  

Well, well, well, let me just say that it has been a long time since my heart felt so full from watching a movie. 

I want everyone I know to see this movie and I don’t want to give away details. I will only say that it is beautiful!  It is about birth and death and choices and love and living our lives!  And recognizing that the little things in our everyday life ARE actually the big things!

I posted my first entry to my Blog yesterday morning about committing my life to noticing it’s daily wonderments. And then within 2 short hours I received a blessing that made my heart swell and my spirit dance. I wanted to stand up at the end of the movie and shout out a confirming YES!

It truly is About Time!  I was to see this movie at the precise time that I saw it.  My heart was long overdue to experience the many emotions embraced by the movie.  It gave me the affirmation necessary to continue down the road that brings simple joys everyday. 

And this morning somehow the sun seems brighter!